The Derelict - Free Audiobook

THAT DAY

  It got beyond all orders an' it got beyond all 'ope;
   It got to shammin' wounded an' retirin' from the 'alt.
  'Ole companies was lookin' for the nearest road to slope;
   It were just a bloomin' knock-out — an' our fault!

       Now there ain't no chorus 'ere to give,
        Nor there ain't no band to play;
       An' I wish I was dead 'fore I done what I did,
        Or seen what I seed that day!

  We was sick o' bein' punished, an' we let 'em know it, too;
   An' a company-commander up an' 'it us with a sword,
  An' some one shouted “'Ook it!” an' it come to sove-ki-poo,
   An' we chucked our rifles from us — O my Gawd!

  There was thirty dead an' wounded on the ground we wouldn't keep —
   No, there wasn't more than twenty when the front begun to go;
  But, Christ! along the line o' flight they cut us up like sheep,
   An' that was all we gained by doin' so.

  I 'eard the knives be'ind me, but I dursn't face my man,
   Nor I don't know where I went to, 'cause I didn't 'alt to see,
  Till I 'eard a beggar squealin' out for quarter as 'e ran,
   An' I thought I knew the voice an' — it was me!

  We was 'idin' under bedsteads more than 'arf a march away;
   We was lyin' up like rabbits all about the countryside;
  An' the major cursed 'is Maker 'cause 'e lived to see that day,
   An' the colonel broke 'is sword acrost, an' cried.

  We was rotten 'fore we started — we was never disciplined;
   We made it out a favour if an order was obeyed;
  Yes, every little drummer 'ad 'is rights an' wrongs to mind,
   So we had to pay for teachin' — an' we paid!

  The papers 'id it 'andsome, but you know the Army knows;
   We was put to groomin' camels till the regiments withdrew,
  An' they gave us each a medal for subduin' England's foes,
   An' I 'ope you like my song — because it's true!

       An' there ain't no chorus 'ere to give,
        Nor there ain't no band to play;
       But I wish I was dead 'fore I done what I did,
        Or seen what I seed that day!