Katherine's Misery

--- Audio Transcription ---

To preface, this story was written around two in the morning in the summer of 2017.

I had no true intention behind it except that it was made purely out of impulse. Let's proceed with the story.

I implored my daughter Katherine not to attend the event. It was not made for innocent girls like her. She was classy and intelligent and knew she had a bright future. The lone reason she wanted to go was through peer pressure. Her friends rarely influenced her decisions outside of the household and school, but this one occasion was different. Her past reluctance has caused her friends to become more distant from her. A highly sociable individual, Katherine suffered from the absence of conversation. It devoured her very being to the point that she was no longer recognizable physically and mentally. Becoming increasingly concerned, I asked her what was wrong. She explained to me her situation, and I assured her that real friends will emerge in her life. I insisted that she begin making new friends around the neighborhood and at school. Hesitant to respond, she agreed to talk with other social groups.

Weeks later, little had changed. Her moods became sporadic and irregular. One moment she was positive and approachable. The next, she was aggressive and violent. I thought that I would lose my little girl. I loved her, but she was soon to become an adult and make her own decisions. By this point in her life, I had almost no say, and I did not want to. I still wanted to help guide her, but my words of wisdom only went so far. I hoped that whatever she chose to do, it would bring her great success and exciting opportunities. Ultimately, the path she took in life would be out of my control.

After several conversations, Katherine still had remained the same disoriented and moody soon-to-be adult. It was utterly heartbreaking to watch her fall apart, and I knew I had to intervene in some way. I demanded to know where she had been the past two weeks. I did not allow her to leave my room until I received a satisfactory answer. Suddenly, she burst into tears and sobbed uncontrollably. My fears became realities: she attended many parties and recently discovered that she was pregnant. As upset as I was, I loved her and held her close. I told her that everything would be fine. "This is simply a lesson that you must learn from, and I know you will," I said.

Weeks passed and her mood began to drastically improve. I often wondered if she was merely faking it so I would bother her less, but she began to take time out of her day to talk with me about her social progress. I was impressed, but something still felt a bit off. I wasn't entirely sure what worried me. Her pretending to be more upbeat was a thought I could not stop entertaining. One day, I impulsively asked Katherine if everything was truly okay. She said that everything was okay, but her response did not sound genuine. She had her final high school exams the next day and was expected to return home after all exams were completed.

A few hours after school ended, there was no sight of Katherine. I got off from work early to find her. When I arrived home, she was not present. I called the school, and they said that she did not attend school. I had her cellphone number, so I dialed and called it several times, only for the calls to go straight to voicemail. This put me in a state of immense panic. I frantically dialed various numbers of relatives and other people she knew, but no one had seen her. I did not know what to do. The likelihood that I would not see her again increased as the night sky fell upon me. I went back inside to regain my composure. When I walked into her room to search for clues, I noticed a small slip of paper laying on her bed. Her name was written on the front. I opened it up, reading the note:

"Life comes with many challenges, some more difficult than others. I struggled with the challenge of living through the burden of extreme depressive episodes. Today, the struggle has become too much to bear. I cannot take another day of sadness and misery. Dad, I am sorry for all of the pain I put you through. You deserved a better daughter. I was a failure. I am useless to society."

Finishing the note, I was in sheer disbelief. I thought that it couldn't be real. I immediately broke down and cried profusely. My only child was gone. I would never see or hear from her ever again. I knew that I had failed in being a responsible father. I went through an uncomfortable and sleepless night. It was the worst night of my life. The next day, I received a call from the school. They informed me that Katherine's body was found just outside of the campus. She had overdosed on medication for her depression.

That day, I realized that if you want the best for your children, you must be more involved in their life to ensure that they are living as comfortably and healthy as possible. Increasing your daily involvement might not only improve a child's mood, but their decision-making as well. No matter their age, you should always make an effort to be their biggest and strongest supporter, especially in times of need.

Image source: [https://www.wallpaperflare.com/woman-facing-towards-white-background-sad-depressed-depression-wallpaper-zjhla](https://www.wallpaperflare.com/woman-facing-towards-white-background-sad-depressed-depression-wallpaper-zjhla)